Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
