Sponge bath it is.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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