the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
