I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Randomize
