plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
