White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
