hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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