Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
