I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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