just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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