so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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