just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
