ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
