We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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