Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
