put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
