The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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