She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize