You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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