Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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