had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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