since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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