Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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