The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
