well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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