Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
