can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize