I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
