Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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