It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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