I want to stick my p in your. b.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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