worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
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