I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
