marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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