were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
