Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Randomize
