found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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