...so i touched it.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
