Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
