you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Randomize
