my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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