Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
She's like a pop up book from hell.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
