I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
