In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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