The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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