Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
