How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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