so that wasnt chicken after all
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
they're like a gay fantastic four
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
