It's like a parade of train wrecks.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
