Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize